Relational styles?
BBDC will charge you TEN DOLLARS+ if you forget your password. WTH. Luckily the shock of the phone assistant's statement was so great that I managed to recall it. Hahahaha.
Maybe with you, it's a respect of privacy thing, or that i'll forever be just another despo army guy... I wish you'd just tell me your reasons. If you don't want to initiate any sort of conversation even once in awhile, that's fine... but if I do try to talk to you I'd appreciate if you'd at least tell me that you're busy or that you dislike handphone radiation.... I'm not trying to lash out here or anything, maybe I might be overbearing or something... But if you really think that, I'll never know it until you say something... Sigh.
Maybe with you, it's a respect of privacy thing, or that i'll forever be just another despo army guy... I wish you'd just tell me your reasons. If you don't want to initiate any sort of conversation even once in awhile, that's fine... but if I do try to talk to you I'd appreciate if you'd at least tell me that you're busy or that you dislike handphone radiation.... I'm not trying to lash out here or anything, maybe I might be overbearing or something... But if you really think that, I'll never know it until you say something... Sigh.
posted by moet at 10:35 PM
4 Comments:
yeah you are overbearing, why do you like to emo on your blog when it's bloody obvious who you're talking about? oh, and so what am i supposed to say now, apologise? if not, then what's your purpose in writing here whenever you get brushed off? i don't need an explanation because i get so sick of them
... I'm not asking you for an apology. I'm asking you to stop your habit of ignoring me completely whenever you think I'm 'up to something', but you don't seem to think that's a justifiable thing to do.
At least acknowledge that I've tried to give you as much space (vacuum) as can exist in any given friendship. I didn't disturb you at all during your exam period. I ask if you're busy before I call, and if you say you are, I go away. When have I not?
When I do try to clarify things with you personally, you just brush me off and say you have to go. Why? Because you think I enjoy talking about emo things? Because you hold such a huge grudge against me that words can't express it? Of course I'll write it here then, to say the things that you don't want to hear in a way that is as nice sounding as possible.
If all you'll ever want from me is more distance, then just say it. I don't know what makes you happy anymore if you're not even willing to have one conversation in me in three months of absolute silence.
okay since you asked for something more than silence i'll give it to you.
honestly i dont feel comfortable talking to you right now. you may be right about the 'up to something' part. it's something i can't explain i feel a need to stay away when i'm faced with such situations because if every little thing that you do would cause me to get the wrong idea then i think it's better for both of us if we just keep our distance for now.
about the clarification part, sometimes i feel that there isn't a need to clarify anything. i don't want you to for instance, feel a need to post a little paragraph everytime you feel that you needed to explain 'what went wrong', or call me to explain yourself.
i know i'm being unfair to you here. but it doesn't mean that i don't want this friendship. it means something to me, don't think i've forgotten the things you've done for me all these years, i'll remember them, but i'm telling you now i can't handle it and so i'm doing the only way i can by keeping a distance and i hope you'll give me time even if it seems unfair to you now.
Regarding the whole 'clarification' thing.. I guess I do some rather unnecessary things and these really are some of my worse moments. I thought I was being constructive, but I really wasn't and I guess I'll have to work on it more.
..Thank you for being honest with me, really... and I guess some distance is something I could use myself. I hardly think that I'm above doubt; I know I'm not always entirely forthcoming about a lot of things, but this friendship is important to me and you can always be sure of that..
How awkward this seems. haha.. I'll see you when I see you =)
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